The good in goodbye

19 Aug

Today, a person so close to my heart is on her way going to a place far, far away from me. And perhaps, when she gets to read this, she’s already on the other side of the Earth where the only way possible to reach her will be through this virtual world.

Thinking that as the hour tick by, the plane goes farther up and farther away, my heart is turning into knots as the tears in my eyes relentlessly roll down my cheeks.

I’ve only known her for barely four months yet in that very short span of time she brought so much thrill and bliss in my life. What more to this is that we have shared so much of our lives— shared secrets, cried over heartbreak, slept with a single pillow and a single blanket, talked about anything up to the wee hours in the morning, split foods on a single plate, drunk a liter of tequila, slipped into same shirt, went partying and malling, road tripping, and the list could go on forever. She’s just so full of zest and vibrancy that every ordinary day spent with her turned out a very, very special day.

What makes her someone very dearly is that she has defined fun in a very concrete way that sleep-deprived nights never seem to matter anymore. That beer-bellies aren’t a worry anymore. That money-spending don’t stress me anymore. And that laughter and excitement became so natural that even time seem unable to stop us anymore.

While I am happy that she’s having a greener, new beginning, I am sad that my days will no longer be the same like it was when she was still here. To spend nights drinking a tower of beer. To chat about love and relationships. To drink coffee at Macky’s. To eat sisig with soy sauce which she didn’t like at first but eventually became her favorite. To stroll under the CLSU trees. To sleep-over my apartment and watch movies or just stare cutely at each other. To hug with when I feel being alone. To just see her smiling and brave, being the woman I’ve always known was inside her.

It’s funny how tables turn and eventually end up facing a new day without the person you used to spend with. It’s funny how you are sharing jovial moments today and end up crying the next day. But change, no matter how painful they could be, need to be embraced with full heart and hope that it will bring a better ending.

And just like a childhood friend that can’t come along for our ride, we have to learn how to let them go. How to support their new endeavors that don’t involves us or our day-to-day lives that don’t include one another, or the goals they’re reaching that we can’t quite see. How to stand on our own and let them stand as well. And how to pin on hope that distance won’t change the bond conceived along.

To my lovely friend, I wish you all the best. The happiness and love you brought me will remain a priceless gift safely caged in my heart.

I love you.

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